PROF. NOMUCH ON ENERGY
PROF NOMUCH ON ENERGY
A NEW SOURSE OF ENERGY
I would say good afternoon, but to some of you lazy dumplings it’s your morning. Also you party animals, you are wishing it was night so hard that it might as well be. Oh spit what should I say good morning, afternoon, or night. I’ll say Hi, no too informal maybe hello! Yes but Helloooooo!! I’m Prof. Don T, Nomuch [hold the applause till the end] from Norsquat U. Todays subject is energy – where we lest expect to find it, but we are looking.
We know that we are surrounded by energy its just we have to put it to use. For instance, stand in the sun with no air movement, such as in a large test tube, and man you are going to get hot! Wow I mean hot! I tried it once that was enough. Test tubes are darn hard to get out especially when they are hot. Spit! If you should want to try this experiment be sure to practice your exit a couple of times in the shade. Oh spit be sure to get a flat bottom tube, the rounded bottom one are hard to stand in, your left foot will slide down on top of your of your right one or the other way around. Spit The first one on the bottom ends up on the bottom. Do you understand the complexity of this? That energy boy, I mean getting out of the test tube, spit. We, the ones of us that have been in the field, realize that energy is every where – wind, water, sun, and even ants. I’m in the middle of an experiment [that I’ll give you a full report on at a later date] to determine how many ants it would take on a wheel or treadmill to generate one watt of electric. When that is determined, I know what you are thinking, that ants come in different sizes from them little vulgar ones to the larger Texas size ones. Well we discovered that early in the experiment, I think it was on day 157 or there about to be exact. Where was I when I thought of your thoughts and interrupted myself? Spit! Oh yes, when we determine that number then the work gets simpler, well a little, for instance if you wanted to light a 60 watt bulb you would take the first number and multiply by the last number. In this case the first number would be the number of ants needed and the last number would be the number of watts needed to light a 60 watt bulb which in this case would be 60 or put another way number of ants needed [X] multiplied by number of watts [60] is that plain enough? The lamp would be lit only during the working hours of the ants, so it’s plain to see, even for an uneducated mind, that an alternative power source is needed. This will come out in our report when our experiment is through.
I was looking through some of my old things and came across my old boy scout compass boy do I have some old stuff its old, some is almost as old as I am spit! Back to the compass, I was always taken, about the needle always pointing north. You can turn it real quick and spit; it will swing around and point north. I even put my hand over it still the same. Needle pointed north. Then I performed the ultimate test I laid a map on the table with the top of the map to the north set the compass on the map it pointed to the top of the map. Then I did it, I took the compass out of the room, turned the map around 180 degrees brought the compass back in the room real fast, and set it on the map. Spit, it pointed to the bottom of the map. You see it wasn’t fooled, it still pointed north. This is the kind of action you would and should expect from an experienced experimenter. Spit. I wasn’t born yesterday, now we have a solid foundation to work on. A compass always points north unless you are in Australia. We aren’t there so I won’t get into that.
How do we get energy that’s in a compass to work for us? That’s a good question and who ever asked it should have to work it out. Not having the foggiest idea who the dumpling was, my crew and I went to work. Maybe I should have said my crew and I went to the lab. It’s a good way to get out of the house. Some guys talk about working in their melon patch [honeydews] you know honey do this honey do that. If I was talk about that stuff I guess I’d talk about cleaning out my stable because I’m always in deep dodo. Maybe we went to the lab for different reasons it doesn’t matter we are here looking for energy, I need it cause I’m a little pooped. After many weeks of wild guess and wilder ideas we decided on making the needle spin, and then we would have a motor. We would have to demagnetize the needle for a short period of time or add current in the right time and places To do this we decided on a rabbit kind like what they use at dog races, only ours would run around the compass. It wouldn’t get the juice until it hit east. I’m sorry, juice is electrical current, that’s what we call it in the lab; in lab talk juice is electric current, like the MDs call their clients, customers, or whatever, the sick people. Patients. They are not patient, who could be in a room full of sickies, squalling kids, and drooling old people, and winning middle people. Nothing but old magazines, if you have been sick in the last thirty years you have seen them. WWII just isn’t news anymore. And the TV with no sound, you see a country being blown up and you wonder who the president has us fighting now. An announcer is giving ball scores and you don’t know if the Cubbies were beaten bad or lost by only 4 or 5 runs. I get so beside myself that I have to go to psychiatrist, after going to my Dr., to get myself put back into me. Did you notice I didn’t say visit my Dr. I didn’t because he doesn’t talk. He uses words that even I, Prof Nomuch, doesn’t know, them are some big words, believe me. Spit, I digress where were we, good question WWW, I’ve heard that some where before, spit. Back to the rabbit we will give him juice at east, south, and southwest, and then let nature take the needle north that’s our free juice. He’s a real juiced up rabbit, it depends on the size of our compass, and we may have to make him a fox. Or maybe an elephant, wow, I don’t know if an elephant will go fast enough. We will have to try, that’s what we experimenters do.
Till we meet in the classroom of life,
Prof. Don T. Nomuch © 2006
A NEW SOURSE OF ENERGY
I would say good afternoon, but to some of you lazy dumplings it’s your morning. Also you party animals, you are wishing it was night so hard that it might as well be. Oh spit what should I say good morning, afternoon, or night. I’ll say Hi, no too informal maybe hello! Yes but Helloooooo!! I’m Prof. Don T, Nomuch [hold the applause till the end] from Norsquat U. Todays subject is energy – where we lest expect to find it, but we are looking.
We know that we are surrounded by energy its just we have to put it to use. For instance, stand in the sun with no air movement, such as in a large test tube, and man you are going to get hot! Wow I mean hot! I tried it once that was enough. Test tubes are darn hard to get out especially when they are hot. Spit! If you should want to try this experiment be sure to practice your exit a couple of times in the shade. Oh spit be sure to get a flat bottom tube, the rounded bottom one are hard to stand in, your left foot will slide down on top of your of your right one or the other way around. Spit The first one on the bottom ends up on the bottom. Do you understand the complexity of this? That energy boy, I mean getting out of the test tube, spit. We, the ones of us that have been in the field, realize that energy is every where – wind, water, sun, and even ants. I’m in the middle of an experiment [that I’ll give you a full report on at a later date] to determine how many ants it would take on a wheel or treadmill to generate one watt of electric. When that is determined, I know what you are thinking, that ants come in different sizes from them little vulgar ones to the larger Texas size ones. Well we discovered that early in the experiment, I think it was on day 157 or there about to be exact. Where was I when I thought of your thoughts and interrupted myself? Spit! Oh yes, when we determine that number then the work gets simpler, well a little, for instance if you wanted to light a 60 watt bulb you would take the first number and multiply by the last number. In this case the first number would be the number of ants needed and the last number would be the number of watts needed to light a 60 watt bulb which in this case would be 60 or put another way number of ants needed [X] multiplied by number of watts [60] is that plain enough? The lamp would be lit only during the working hours of the ants, so it’s plain to see, even for an uneducated mind, that an alternative power source is needed. This will come out in our report when our experiment is through.
I was looking through some of my old things and came across my old boy scout compass boy do I have some old stuff its old, some is almost as old as I am spit! Back to the compass, I was always taken, about the needle always pointing north. You can turn it real quick and spit; it will swing around and point north. I even put my hand over it still the same. Needle pointed north. Then I performed the ultimate test I laid a map on the table with the top of the map to the north set the compass on the map it pointed to the top of the map. Then I did it, I took the compass out of the room, turned the map around 180 degrees brought the compass back in the room real fast, and set it on the map. Spit, it pointed to the bottom of the map. You see it wasn’t fooled, it still pointed north. This is the kind of action you would and should expect from an experienced experimenter. Spit. I wasn’t born yesterday, now we have a solid foundation to work on. A compass always points north unless you are in Australia. We aren’t there so I won’t get into that.
How do we get energy that’s in a compass to work for us? That’s a good question and who ever asked it should have to work it out. Not having the foggiest idea who the dumpling was, my crew and I went to work. Maybe I should have said my crew and I went to the lab. It’s a good way to get out of the house. Some guys talk about working in their melon patch [honeydews] you know honey do this honey do that. If I was talk about that stuff I guess I’d talk about cleaning out my stable because I’m always in deep dodo. Maybe we went to the lab for different reasons it doesn’t matter we are here looking for energy, I need it cause I’m a little pooped. After many weeks of wild guess and wilder ideas we decided on making the needle spin, and then we would have a motor. We would have to demagnetize the needle for a short period of time or add current in the right time and places To do this we decided on a rabbit kind like what they use at dog races, only ours would run around the compass. It wouldn’t get the juice until it hit east. I’m sorry, juice is electrical current, that’s what we call it in the lab; in lab talk juice is electric current, like the MDs call their clients, customers, or whatever, the sick people. Patients. They are not patient, who could be in a room full of sickies, squalling kids, and drooling old people, and winning middle people. Nothing but old magazines, if you have been sick in the last thirty years you have seen them. WWII just isn’t news anymore. And the TV with no sound, you see a country being blown up and you wonder who the president has us fighting now. An announcer is giving ball scores and you don’t know if the Cubbies were beaten bad or lost by only 4 or 5 runs. I get so beside myself that I have to go to psychiatrist, after going to my Dr., to get myself put back into me. Did you notice I didn’t say visit my Dr. I didn’t because he doesn’t talk. He uses words that even I, Prof Nomuch, doesn’t know, them are some big words, believe me. Spit, I digress where were we, good question WWW, I’ve heard that some where before, spit. Back to the rabbit we will give him juice at east, south, and southwest, and then let nature take the needle north that’s our free juice. He’s a real juiced up rabbit, it depends on the size of our compass, and we may have to make him a fox. Or maybe an elephant, wow, I don’t know if an elephant will go fast enough. We will have to try, that’s what we experimenters do.
Till we meet in the classroom of life,
Prof. Don T. Nomuch © 2006
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